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How Chronic Knee Pain Impacts Daily Life - and Why Practicing the Pause Matters.

  • Sep 18
  • 7 min read

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Chronic knee pain is more than an ache in your joints. For many adults like me 50+, it becomes a daily companion that quietly influences nearly every aspect of your life. If you’re preparing for knee surgery or living with chronic pain, it’s not just your body that needs attention - it’s your sleep, your mood, your relationships, and the rhythm of your daily life.


That’s where Practicing the Pause comes in. By slowing down and creating intentional moments of rest and awareness, you can prepare yourself physically, emotionally, and spiritually for the healing journey ahead.

"Chronic pain impacts every corner of your life, but it doesn’t have to control your story!"


The hidden ways chronic pain reshapes everything we thought we knew about ourselves.


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When chronic knee pain first crept into my life, I naively thought it was just about the physical discomfort. As a seasoned Massage Therapist I figured I'd deal with some aches, maybe scale back my workouts a bit, and soldier on. What I didn't expect was how profoundly it would reshape every corner of my existence - from my sleep patterns to my bank account, from my relationships to my sense of self.


For the past two years, I've been living with severe osteoarthritis in my knee. After more than a year on the waitlist for a knee replacement, the call finally came - my surgery is scheduled for October! Am I happy? Absolutely. Am I grateful I live in Canada? Without a doubt. Am I the model patient? Not exactly. (I'm apologizing here and now to my family and friends for what's to come! :)


This journey for me has been full of ups and downs, steep learning curves, and more than a few humbling moments. Let's just say that trading in my sexy heels for a pirate's peg leg walk has done a number on my ego.


The Domino Effect: When Pain Touches Everything


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I was shocked by how much my chronic knee pain impacted my sleep, mood, relationships, and my massage therapy practice. The transformation was swift and merciless. I went from kickboxing and yoga five times a week, confidently treating 20 clients weekly, to a version of myself I barely recognized. The numbers tell the story: I gained 50 pounds, my yoga practice dwindled to twice a week, and my client load dropped to 8-10 per week. The impact on my physical, mental, and financial health was devastating.

And to add insult to injury - My monthly ritual of dying my hair was getting way too much to handle, and I just said "F*ck it! I'm going grey!" (That's been a journey, let me tell you, but I digress.)


The Invisible Losses that no one talks about.


Social Life: Vanishing Act

My social life became non-existent. My love life? Forget it! Simple pleasures that once brought joy - walking with family, mustering energy for a picnic, hanging out at the beach here in beautiful Victoria, B.C.- became hopeless obstacles. The vibrant, sexy, active person I once was felt like a distant memory.


Strategic Living

I found myself creating strategic plans just for basic survival (a little dramatic I know - but true:) Parking became a tactical decision - how close could I get to the grocery store? How many steps could I realistically handle? My meager attempts at maintaining two yoga classes a week required the kind of logistical planning usually reserved for military operations.


The Toxic Spiral

My new habits were becoming toxic and destructive. Wine became my evening companion, while Advil and Tylenol transformed into my closest allies. I watched helplessly as my chronic pain slowly took over, dictating not just what I could do, but who I was becoming.


The Hidden Costs of Chronic Pain


What struck me most was how chronic pain doesn't just hurt - it steals. It stole my identity as an active, sexy, vibrant person. It stole my confidence as a therapist who could fully show up for her clients. It stole intimate moments with loved ones and spontaneous adventures in one of Canada's most beautiful cities.

The financial impact was equally brutal. Fewer clients meant reduced income at a time when I needed more resources for treatment, adaptive equipment, and pain management strategies. The cruel irony of chronic pain is that it diminishes your earning capacity precisely when your expenses are climbing.


The Wake-Up Call: When Dreams Meet Reality


My saving grace was planning a dream trip to Europe - a 10 - day cruise on the Meditreanen and 8 - day train trip through Italy! But as the departure date approached, reality hit hard. How the heck was I going to walk around the ship? How was I going to get on and off the "Vaporetto's" (the only way to travel) in Venice? How would I navigate the beautiful cobblestone streets of Verona, Torino, and Florence? The thought of walking through the Colosseum and Vatican museums in Rome felt impossible.

This dream trip was becoming my living nightmare.


The Intervention I Didn't Know I Needed


I needed a new narrative. My life was not the way I wanted or planned it to be - I needed an intervention. I needed to take a Pause.

This sparked my personal journey to practice what I preach and truly "Practice the Pause." It was time to learn to accept what is for this moment and create the next moment with enthusiasm and grace. The irony wasn't lost on me - here I was, a therapist who taught others about mindful living, finally being forced to apply these principles to my own crisis.


Learning to Pause: My Pain Points and Discoveries


"Practicing the Pause" isn't about giving up or accepting defeat. It's about creating space between stimulus and response, between pain and panic, between what is and what could be. Here are a few of the pain points I encountered and what I learned to do along the way:


Sleep: The Rest That Doesn’t Come Easily


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Knee pain often makes restful sleep feel impossible. Tossing and turning, struggling to find a comfortable position, or waking with sharp pain can leave you exhausted. Over time, poor sleep reduces your body's ability to heal and weakens your resilience while spiking cortisol levels.


Pause Practice: Before bed, try 5 minutes of mindful breathing with your hands resting gently on your knees. As you inhale, imagine sending softness to the joints. As you exhale, release the day's tension. This small practice signals to your nervous system that it's safe to rest and restore.


Mood: The Hidden Weight of Pain


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Living with daily pain can wear down even the most optimistic spirit. Frustration, irritability, and even depression can creep in when movement is limited and discomfort is constant. Pain narrows your focus, making it harder to feel joy or stay present in the moment. This was very difficult for me -generally I am a very happy person, but this uninvited Ogre crept into my psyche creating chaos!


Pause Practice: Throughout the day, stop for a "3-breath pause." Inhale slowly, hold gently for a beat, then exhale fully. With each cycle, silently repeat: "I am more than this pain."  ; Inhale slowly, hold gently for a beat, then exhale fully. With each cycle, silently repeat: "I am more than this pain." ; Inhale slowly, hold gently for a beat, then exhale fully. With each cycle, silently repeat: "I am more than this pain." 


*This simple act can create a pocket of calm in an otherwise overwhelming day


Relationships: The Ripple Effect


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Chronic pain doesn't only affect you - it touches the people you love. You may feel guilty for saying no to outings, irritable with your partner or kids, or dependent on family members in ways that shift your sense of independence. This can strain relationships and leave you feeling isolated, ashamed, and quite frankly, angry! As a 56-year-old single mom and fiercely independent this infuriated me, but I learned to take a Pause. I learned it's okay not to be happy 365 days out of the year. I learned grace for myself and how to recalibrate my nervous system.


Pause Practice: Before responding to a loved one, Pause - take a breath. Notice how your pain is shaping your words or emotions. Taking even a short moment to breathe can create space for more compassion and focus - both for yourself and for others. Yes! it's that simple.



Daily Life: The Small Things Become Big Things


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From climbing stairs to shopping for groceries, chronic pain makes ordinary activities feel like a nightmare. Over time, this can shrink your world and chip away at your confidence.

Preparing for my trip and surgery means acknowledging these limitations while finding new ways to stay connected and active.

Pause Practice: Before each daily task, pause and ask: "How can I make this easier on myself?" 

Maybe it's taking breaks while cooking, asking for help with heavy lifting, or simply celebrating the fact that you can do it - even if it took longer than before. Remember grace.


Why Practicing the Pause Matters


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Whether you're facing knee surgery like me, planning that dream trip, or just navigating daily activities with chronic pain, "Practicing the Pause" is your secret weapon. Surgery is not just a physical procedure - it's a whole-person experience. But so is living with chronic pain day after day, preparing for travel with mobility challenges, or simply making it through grocery shopping when every step matters.

The more you Practice the Pause now, the more resilient, calm, and prepared you'll feel - whether that's for surgery day, stepping onto that European cruise ship, or tackling your weekly errands.


Pausing teaches you to listen to your body, regulate your emotions, and release tension in your fascia. This creates space for healing, adaptation, and creative problem - solving that serves you in every situation. Trust me, I've been doing this for the last 12 weeks and have noticed a huge difference - I am practicing what I preach!


Healing begins long before you step into an operating room - it starts the moment you choose to pause and listen to what your body and spirit need. By learning to Practice the Pause, you're giving yourself the gift of presence, patience, and self - compassion - tools that will serve you whether you're navigating cobblestones in Italy, walking through your neighborhood, or recovering from surgery.



Moving Forward with Intention


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A few takeaways: Chronic pain impacts every corner of your life, but it doesn't have to control your story. "Practicing the Pause" is the bridge between pain and healing, frustration and hope, surgery and recovery.


My European adventure became more than just a vacation - it became a testament to what's possible when we "Practice the Pause" and approach our challenges with both acceptance and creative problem - solving (with walking sticks, ice packs and maybe a little vino!)


Thank you for popping by. I hope some of these remedies help you on your journey.


Stay tuned for more real talk, practical strategies, and hopefully a few laughs along the way!

Cheers, Kelly


"Shifts happen when you Practice the Pause."

 
 
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